The hardest thing about love isn’t giving it, Its receiving it. You ponder and ask yourself what is it intrinsic about me that deserves to be externally appreciated. That feeling of appreciation you learn to comfort your insecurities. But What happens when those insecurities become defining characteristics in moments of tribulation. Is the person your receiving the love from bound to scatter like restaurant roaches upon the 8 am shift and sunlight glare. At what point does one no longer want to bare your cross
I mentioned the hardest part about being loved is receiving it. We all grow with characteristics that we wish we could change. We develop facades , build walls and find a way to block the possible ways to hide while others may appreciate those flaws. But at what point do they, the other begin to recognize those flaws as flaws.
So I don’t know if I can ever be loved. I don’t know how to receive it. I asked a special someone if they’d still feel a way if I were x. I asked if they would scatter if the lights came on. My gut says they would but my heart wants to believe they wouldn’t. Lets just hope the lights don’t come on.
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